The First One

DIFFERENT! CRAZY! IRRATIONAL NITWITS! LOUDMOUTHS!!…

The list of colourful words that “normal” people often use to tag us with is quite endless. Meaningless labels? Harsh judgement? Uncalled for criticism? NO SIREEEE!! We embrace the weirdness!! [Yea,we’re that type.]

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As kids we were the annoying restless kind, wandering off into the big unknown, our imagination often running faster than our chubby legs could carry us (yea! I was a fat baby!! -_-), those were the days of messy play dough and make believe friends [and pooping all over], but the baby fat soon melted away. [No ways, she’s still fat! xP]

Enter the ABC’s and lessons on not hogging things selfishly (Glob slept through those ones on sharing… Yes! I made a dig at his six year old self, so what? He was annoying then and hasn’t changed since). Those were the lazy laidback days, when no one knew any better, there were no stereotypes, and no one knew what normal was, for all they knew the weird kid eating glue out of the jar was a pretty okay kid as far as kids go.

Scabby knees and spitty handshakes, secret codes and cooties… sudden zits and squeaky voices, hairy vajajays and pits (Yea I said vajayjay!! I’m not low-key about these things, consider yourself warned!!), hormones on fire,crushes on that person who is your soulmate and who you’ll get married to and live happily ever after [Yea, that was me] only to learn that he’s an immature freakazoid who’s flirting with your BFF [or that she’s a slimy flirtatious slut!] It was an awkward struggle, a war of sorts, you against your parents, against your bratty sibling whom you keep stealing stuff from [or against your stoopid sibling who stole it in the first place!], against teachers who didn’t understand teen-angst and kept on piling homework, against aunts that kept records of which neighbours son did what.

While ALL of that was happening,there was a Blob trying to fit in at the bajillion schools she kept getting transferred to, [And a Glob trying to keep it together in the only school he’s ever been to!], but we made it! – With decent grades, some awesome friends and loads of memories of school. Then came the BIG life changing moment… college! That place where parents send you to be an intellectual and fully functional member of the society,that place where we morph into mature, responsible adults [hehe mature… xP], that place where we get familiar with the nuances of the big scary  world! But it was also the place that we went to get high on life,the place we went to bunk classes,the place we went to figure out our sexuality,our individuality and all the other ities, the place we went to in the hopes of fitting in some ridiculous amounts of fun before actual “adult” life began.Yea, parents and kids often seem like they aren’t part of the same species,which would explain all the raised voices,countless slamming of doors, [ignoring of phone calls],yadayadayada.

We weren’t much different from the normal set, but,we were a notch weirder than them nevertheless. You’d think with all the gobsmacking amount of abnormal radiation we were emitting that we’d be drawn to each other, [like bees to nectar], like mice to cheese, [like me to food!] (OK Shutup!) But instead, we spent most of  freshman year thinking that the other was stoopidly inferior [and mind-numbingly annoying]. What with my jumpiness and his…see? I didn’t know him at all :O [*sniff*]. Then we got into one of those relationships, friends-of-friends-of-friends, and it was HARD to get rid of all those hyphenations, BUTTT [hehe “BUTT”] we got through all that and realised our similarities were uncanny, the same jumpiness, impulsiveness, bubbling with mischief and mirth, the super awesome power of irritationability… [It was like looking into a mirror! And you’re not happy with the jumpy haired, crazy thing that looks back, but meh whatever]

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Our other friends eventually learned to tolerate the both of us put together [Yea they really tried!], believe me, even I wouldn’t have been able to. What with all the pushing and shoving and food fights and irrational plans. In fact, it was those irrational plans that finally led to the monstrous joint telekinetic brain [Wait!Wasn’t it the lack of much brain functionality? Oh that was just her]

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The monstrosity that is our brains, a living breathing person all by itself (If we’d ever  be beheaded I think our brains would be the creepy kind that’d be kept in jars and they’d even talk to each other.)

As I was saying, we’ll never know, but what we did know, is  that we were going to cause a ruckus and leave a mark wherever we go. [Before you’re blinded by the AWESOMENESS that is us,know we’re human too…] Yea, we aren’t always so happy-go-lucky,that’d be positively frustrating, we breakdown about silly stuff like how they got rid of popsicles from the canteen [or failing that trig test], and what do we do when we can’t take it anymore??? We take a ride! Go binge eating at the nearest unhealthy restaurant! Sit inside the car and lounge,feeling fat and happy (hence the name Blob and Glob) [and not talk about all the shit that’s raining down]. On other days, prospects are usually brighter and crazier! Spontaneous trips, amazing birthday planning,dreams of running a shack in Australia or running away and making a living out of selling shark porn… [For those people who have fantasies like Chandler… and Treasa! xP]

Maybe we should start a blog [Should we?] Why shouldn’t we?It would be like having our very own personal radio station where people with some sorta similar frequency could tune into…[Yea… I mean there must be some people out there who can relate or who are amused by our semi-mundane lives!]

And thus we created the world of The Marauding Misfits,to broaden the spectrum of people we annoy on a daily basis!! So here goes!! Whopeeeeee!!

[All constructive criticism will be accepted! Mostly…maybe…it’ll be tolerated okay -_-]

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